Saturday October 1st 2022

A Bridge Across Forever

Is death final?

Can we still communicate with our loved ones after they have died?

“Raymond stood in front of cialis canadian pharmacy me at his own funeral. I looked up while they were conducting the service and there he was, only a few feet away. He was so real that I wanted to stop the service.  How could this man be dead when he was standing right in front of me?”

Psychic medium Pam Adams lost her husband Raymond after he was brutally murdered during a hijacking in South Africa’s Kwazulu-Natal province twelve years ago.

Though psychic from a young age, his untimely death shook her to the core – the gentle engineer was her soulmate, lover and best friend.

“However, one must never doubt the powers of the Universe; I had not lost him at all. In fact, I am as close to him now as I ever was,” says Pam.

“There has to be life after death! From the minute Ray passed, I started receiving communication from him.”

For anyone who has lost loved ones, the idea of being able to communicate with them probably seems like wishful thinking. But psychic experts believe in life after death – and say that we can walk the bridge between “the other side” and our physical world.

“It is so much easier to accept (death) when you understand that it is simply a transition, a part of our spiritual journey,” says Pam, who has written a book on her communications with Raymond (Letters from Raymond : A Love Story That Reaches Beyond the Grave, Authorhouse, 2008, £11.99).

Shortly after Raymond’s death, he began “channelling” letters to Pam via a psychic associate. He also provided 21 Universal Lessons which, together with the letters, form the bulk of the book.

“People who don’t know or believe in an afterlife seem to grieve forever. They are often inconsolable and seldom ever really recover or allow themselves to move on,” says Pam, who now runs a spiritual retreat and is a bereavement counsellor.

Life goes on

If death isn’t the end, then where do we go from here? And how is it humanly possible to make contact with those who’ve crossed over?

“Life continues after the physical body dies,” says award-winning author and paranormal experiences expert Jacky Newcomb, aka The Angel Lady.

“Scientists are becoming increasingly aware of multi-levels of dimensions. We exist in many different ways. The physical body is only a vessel for the soul – like a cup holding water; the water being the soul.

“It is the soul that continues after the physical body dies. This soul retains the personality of the previous life and is able (in many cases) to communicate with the living.”

Jacky explains that people who have ‘out of body experiences’ during bodily trauma, illness and accidents, for example, feel that the ‘real’ them is the soul which floats out of the physical body. The personality, she says, is attached to the soul and not the body.

There are several avenues of information about what happens to the soul after physical death, says Jacky. These are :

  • People with near death experiences relate stories of their visits to the other side of life,
  • Loved ones come back from the other side and tell us what happens,
  • People in deep hypnotic trance recall a life in heaven before they were born,
  • Some young children recall being born.

“At the point of physical death the soul leaves the body, lifting out and away. Sometimes the soul will hang around for a while, either checking out the room and the people that are with them when they die, or even floating around looking for loved ones in the hope of saying goodbye.

“Next they are drawn to a white light at the end of a tunnel (sometimes they miss this stage completely and ‘wake up’ on the other side).”

Jacky says that our loved ones are met by deceased relatives and friends (and even the dying will often see late people they knew, gathering around the bed, waiting to collect them).

“On occasion, medical staff report seeing ghost-like people in the room and even ‘see’ a bright white light in the room.”

Jacky believes that once we’ve left our physical bodies, we go through a ‘de-briefing’ of our recent lives, looking at high and low points, as well as lessons learnt. Souls then embark on a range of other activities.

Psychic medium and media personality Belinda Silbert says that life on the ‘other side’ isn’t as different from earth lives. We’re still the same people, with the same personalities.

What she most wants people to realise is that no matter your post-death beliefs, loved ones continue to live beyond the grave – and parting is not permanent, says Belinda, author of A Survival Kit For The Hereafter (Juta’s Double-Storey, 2005, £9.20).

A psychic telephone

Following the death of someone we dearly love, it’s natural to yearn for just one more word, touch or some reassurance that the person we knew is still alive, somewhere.

“Grief is a terrible thing. After losing a loved one the thought that they might be lost to us forever is unbearable,” explains Jacky.

“To know that a loved one exists still in some way is the greatest of comfort. To imagine that you won’t see a precious family member for many years because they ‘live abroad’ is sort of acceptable if you can get the odd ‘text message’. After-life contact is the same.

“In my work I have seen people’s lives transform after contact from ‘the other side’. Knowing that a loved one is ok (actually) speeds up the normal grieving process. I have worked with grief counsellors and healing professionals to help them understand this phenomenon, which regular occurs in their clients.”

Breaking the communication barrier

Once we embrace the idea that our loved ones are still here, albeit it in another dimension, how do we go about making contact?

One method – and probably the easiest for untrained or less confident people – is to communicate through a psychic medium.

There are, however, pitfalls to bear in mind.

“Forming a dependency on the medium can be a problem,” says Pam. “Receiving a message is such a privilege, but we (psychic mediums) cannot always connect, so there is no guarantee that we are going to be given a message.

“Also, spirits do need to move on and progress themselves. Souls can become earthbound and not want to move on if they are held back by a loved one.”

Jacky warns that the communication attempts can become addictive.

“The main reason that our loved ones visit us after death is to reassure us that they are ‘alive’ and well. It is their aim that we continue with a full and happy life.

“They don’t wish that our lives become purely about contacting the other side. After proving the continuance of life, our loved ones also need to withdraw so that they can continue their own progression and lessons.”

With those precautionary measures in place, and once we’re ready to start, what can we expect to happen?

“Give (your loved ones) time and please don’t expect to hear from them each and every day,” says Pam.

“It doesn’t happen that way. Messages do come through, usually to let you know that the departed are well. Encourage your loved one to move on with love and light and don’t hold them back. Seek counselling if you need help or visit a psychic medium, who may be able to reassure you of their progress.”

What types of messages are we likely to receive? Jacky explains that they are usually very similar :

  • I am ok, stop crying for me
  • I want you to LIVE, to carry on and have a wonderful life
  • I am proud of you
  • I am aware of your achievements
  • I am just a thought away
  • We will meet again one day

Start small.  You don’t even need to visit a psychic medium, especially in the beginning.

“Ask your loved one if he or she can reach out to you in a dream visitation – it’s not at all scary,” says Jacky.

“Dream visits are nothing like normal dreams and you will be aware that the loved one has ‘physically died’ in the dream visitation – it may even confuse you, as you may often say, ‘but you’re dead aren’t you?’

“When you wake up, you’ll feel that the experience was ‘more real’ than any dream you have had before.

Tips for talking to your loved ones

Paranormal experiences expert Jacky Newcomb offers practical suggestions for opening the channels of communication with deceased relatives and friends.

“Reaching out to loved ones after they have died is something that many people want to do. To touch them, see them, smell them or even just to sense them one last time.

“Spirit contact will not bring your loved one back and you need time to come to terms with your grief before this (communication) will help you at all.”

A good psychic medium – one with the ability to contact the death – can be a comfort, but it can also be a frustrating experience.

Sometimes the contact is clear and you know that you’ve reached the person, but sometimes the message is not as clear, so the meeting did not bring you any comfort.

Jacky reminds us that reaching out and touching the spirit of the deceased person is not a replacement for their loss and that we need to remember that the spiritual realm is a “beautiful and wonderful” place.

Your communications may be subtle, she says. Our loved ones want to reach out, but don’t want to scare us. You may experience a scent (flowers, tobacco, or even coconut and chocolate), a touch (on the arm or shoulder), a feeling or dreams and visions.

Jacky’s simple procedure for getting in touch by yourself comprises several steps.

1.    Find a space where you won’t be disturbed. Or, if you feel more comfortable, sit with a friend and do the exercise together.

2.    Play some meditative music – something gentle and relaxing will help to raise the vibration of the room.

3.    Perhaps burn pure frankincense or rose aromatherapy oil (2-3 drops in water)

4.    Say a prayer and light a candle (the candle symbolises bringing in the light).

5.    Hold a photograph or a personal belonging of the person with whom you wish to communicate.

6.    Imagine his or her face and personality. Hold that image and send love. Imagine the love filling your whole being; feel it filling every corner of your body, inside and outside.

7.    Project this love towards the image of your loved one. If you cannot create an image, look at the photograph or just know that they love will reach them.

8.    Close your eyes and hold this image for a few minutes, or as long as you feel comfortable.

9.    Wait and see what happens, taking whatever comes to you. If you have a question, then you may ask it now (in your head, if you wish).

10. When you’re ready, say another prayer and thank any visitors for coming along.

11. Blow out the candle to symbolise the closing of the spirit communication.

How do you feel? Write down what happened. Did you feel  or sense something? People often receive visitations from their loved ones in dreams following this experience, says Jacky.

Most importantly, don’t be disappointed if nothing happens. Occasionally, our loved ones are not able to make contact at that moment and you may feel the presence of another spirit. If they can come, they will.

“You may feel that your loved one is unable to receive you because they are (involved) in other activities. Accept their privacy and know that they are okay.

“Contact will be made if and when it is possible, This is no reflection on their love for you. You can try this again if and when you feel the need.”

Source : (used with permission)

“My mother leaves me feathers”

Entrepreneur and grandmother Gloria Peros was devastated by her mum Anne’s death more than a decade ago.

“We were best friends – like sisters. She died under difficult circumstances and I was so angry. I still haven’t accepted her death, although I have accepted that she’s gone.

“I yearned for contact, but was raised in a Christian home and so didn’t try to make contact with her. Then, several years ago, I was watching television shows by (psychic medium) John Edwards and another man, who were both religious and believed that their psychic gifts were from God.

“It was then that I started thinking about a possible contact with her.”

Gloria asked her mum to leave a sign. The next day, she found feathers in the bath, although all the windows were closed. She began seeing feathers more frequently – and even once found a bird in a closed room.

A psychic medium told Gloria that her late mum enjoys “playing with little things” such as buttons or remote controls. While Gloria watched television, the channels would keep switching and she felt that her mum was present.

“I’m comforted by these experiences. Every time I ask mum to send me a sign, she does. I don’t believe that we die and that’s the end of it. Where we go is peaceful and soft – heaven.”

Whatever happens, be comforted by the fact that messages from ‘the other side’ are meant to heal and provide reassurance. At best, they will encourage you to celebrate a life well-lived – and celebrate your own.

Sources and recommended reading

Award-winning author and paranormal experiences expert Jacky Newcomb. Visit

Psychic medium Pam Adams. Visit or email for consultations and information.

Psychic medium Belinda Silbert. Email or visit or phone +27-799-851333

Angels Watching Over Me, by Jacky Newcomb (Hay House, 2007, £7.99)

Angel Kids, by Jacky Newcomb (Hay House, 2008, £7.99)

Letters From Raymond: A Love Story That Reaches Beyond the Grave, by Pam Adams (AuthorHouse, 2008 £11.99)

A Survival Kit For The Hereafter, by Belinda Silbert (Juta’s Double-Storey, 2005, £9.20).

© Beth Cooper, 2010. This article first appeared in Soul & Spirit magazine.